The Customer Is Always Right

Today I went to Whataburger in south Phoenix and had a great customer service experience that made me think of some other ones from years past. After waiting on my order for far too long, I went to ask the manager where it was. They then brought it right out, but it was the wrong burger. I took it back, they quickly got me the right one and the manager then came out with another order of fries for me and handed me back my money, apologizing profusely. I refused, but she insisted. The elderly man next to me commented, "You sure don't see that anymore." I told the manager that I used to go to Whataburger as a small kid in Dallas, but since then had always lived on the east coast, where they don't have any stores. I had recently moved to Phoenix, but still lived far from the closest Whataburger. So whenever I was near one around mealtime, I tried to swing by. Anyhooo....

In 1986 I was 15 and, with a full-time summer job washing dishes and bussing tables at the local Ponderosa Steakhouse (similar to Sizzler), I had decided I could finally afford my first real guitar. After all, I had proven over the last two years, since my folks had given me a cheapo starter guitar for Christmas, that I was sticking with it and was constantly improving. So I ordered my Kramer Focus 5000. $350 and change was a lot of money in those days for a teenager. But I knew I'd have that much saved up by the time the guitar arrived. It was supposed to take two weeks. Two months later it finally arrived at Nolde's, our local music store. (Remember those in the days before Guitar Center?) I had ordered blue, but red had arrived. The store explained that Kramer had explained that blue just wasn't gonna happen until the next production run months later. Not wanting to wait any longer, I decided to take it home. After a few days one of the pickups began cutting out intermittently. Nowadays, I can fix this kind of thing in no time. But then I was a noobie and this long-awaited, wrong color of a guitar was under warranty. So I decided to write a letter to Kramer and give them a piece of my mind, what little of it I could afford to give away.

I addressed it to Dennis Berardi, then president of Kramer, and whose name I had seen in a Guitar World article on Eddie Van Halen, then Kramer's superstar celebrity endorser. Kramer was based in NJ and I lived there too at the time, so I was expecting some kind of satisfaction.

Sure enough, about a week later my mom yelled upstairs that some guy named Dennis was on the phone for me. I had no idea who that could be, but took the call. I was floored when he gave me his last name. He apologized profusely for the error and explained that they were just so overwhelmed with orders and couldn't keep up with them all. He asked what gauge strings I used and said he'd mail me a case of Floyd Rose strings, about $80 in 1986 dollars. I told him about the issue I was having with a pickup cutting out and he said to come on down to the factory for a tour and to bring my guitar with me. I had asked someone there about a tour a year or so earlier and was told they didn't offer tours to the public. I thought this sounded pretty cool.

Of course, I was too young to drive at the time, so this required enlisting Mom for the long drive down to Monmouth County. I brought my best buddy, Chris, who had had similar issues when ordering his Kramer Baretta a year earlier. My mom dropped us off in the Kramer parking lot and said she'd be back to get us in an hour. In the parking lot I spotted Dennis's Porsche 928 (later confirmed by the keychain on his desk), at that time the fastest production car in the world. Though I was then and still am a 911 guy. We walked right in and found Dennis at his desk. I introduced myself and he was very nice and welcoming. Along his wall were a few prototype guitars and a Spector bass. Dennis walked us into the production area, showed us some of the paint area and lathes, but wouldn't let us see everything. He dropped us off at a workshop and said that guy would take a look at my guitar and bring us back to his office when he was done. He made no mention of one of Eddie Van Halen's painted up guitar bodies sitting on the guy's workbench. Chris and I was starstruck. That's where they built some of Ed's backup guitars, though we both knew Ed built his own Frankenstrat and main 5150 Kramer himself. Later on we saw one of his fully finished, painted up guitars being packed for shipment. Dennis explained it was going right to Ed on the road, as they were playing in Chicago the next day. Dennis also showed us his all areas backstage pass for the upcoming show at the Meadowlands, for which Chris and I also had tickets. He then broke out the Polaroids of Eddie Van Halen and him grilling in Dennis's backyard in Deal, NJ. Man, what a job! Chris and I were drooling by then. Dennis said to come say hello to him at the show if we could find him. We went home walking a few inches off the ground, so excited, so satisfied and loyal Kramer customers forever.

A few weeks later at the Van Halen show, I did manage to spot Dennis near the soundboard and went down to say hello. The gorgeous Valerie Bertinelli was there with him and she was a sight to behold. The show was about to start, so we couldn't talk long. I asked Dennis if could get me an autographed photo of Ed. He said to call his office a few days later to see if he was able to get it. Sure enough, he got it. I was in that neck of the woods a few weeks later and stopped by to pick it up. To this day I have it framed with my ticket stub (I have about 30 more VH ticket stubs since then) in there and a guitar pick I caught from Ed at a show about 10 yrs. later when I was in the front row (another story when I have time to write it). I proudly bought several more Kramers over the years and always think about how great that company was to me.

Eighteen years later, when Ed had his D-Tuna produced and marketed, I called the phone number I saw in a magazine ad, as there was no website listed. The guy who answered was Andy Papiccio. I remembered his name from some Kramer stuff I'd read somewhere and recall seeing him when I visited the factory. I told him the above story and we had a good chat. He told me where I could buy my D-Tuna and I went to get one. Small world.